Hermione Reviews
by JemTmTraveler
Summary: Harry wrote a story. Hermione promised to read it and review every chapter. Based on true events. For my beta. Rated for one word.


Sarin: The insomniac in Jem thought this up last night. A paper prevented her from writing it down. Since she is suck on said paper, we're gonna flip the order of this. Skoal!

Jem: Only you would say "Cheers!" at a time like this.

Sarin: Well, it is finals week next week and u need to either get drunk illegally or write down this story so u can consentrate. Since gaol looks bad right about now…

Jem: FIIIIIINE!

A short story dedicated to the wonderful NeoRyu777: beta, best friend, and 'brother'.

Disclaimer: Like I could own this… oh look, I'm a poor college student. I own only the plot; based on a true story. All flames will be ignored and/or discarded and/or used as confetti and/or sacrificed to the God of Chaos as a random sacrifice (j/k on the last one, but seriously… no just flaming for the hell of it).

----------------------imalineimalineimalineimalineimalineimalineimaline----------------------

On a warm spring day, Hermione Granger sat in her college dorm, waiting for inspiration for a paper she was supposed to write for her finals to arrive. It was odd; she had two papers to write and no inspiration for either of them though they could very well mean her grade. Instead, she was looking for inspiration in the most unlikely place… the wizard-net. She had been asked by her best friend/ honorary brother the infamous Harry Potter to read one of his stories he had posted, and of course she wanted to make him happy. Ever since Voldemort had accidentally committed suicide by trying to convince the wrong dragon to join his cause by the wrong means, the world had gotten unusually dull. 'How stupid could he have been to walk between a dragon and her eggs?!', she pondered as she logged on and began reading the story.

The story was good, no doubt about it. She smiled happily to herself as she left a review on the first chapter. She had a policy never to read incomplete stories and Harry had begged her to leave comments on every chapter, so she did. Unfortunately, as with all red-heads (she had dyed her hair right after graduation and placed a plethora of spells she had created herself on it to keep it indefinitely in control), she had an Irish temper and as such, she failed in the vital virtue of patience. So midway through the story, she began to get bored with leaving a review every chapter. So, she wrote a simple review to an expository chapter and grinned a smile that looked almost evil.

SCENECHANGE!

Harry Potter was minding his own business and checking his wiz-mail. He grinned as he saw a sudden rash of responses from the location he placed his story in a short period of time. He had just reminded Hermione of her promise to read it and notified her that he had just posted the last chapter. He read the reviews until he reached the last one. It was only two words. He gaped at the words and reached for the floo powder to fire call his best friend.

SCENECHANGE!

Hermione heard the call from the fireplace and peered over the top of the computer to see Harry through the fire. She grinned before asking what he wanted. She was reading his story after all.

"HERMIONE! I am not!"

"Yes you are, Harry luv."

"ARE NOT!"

"Are so."

"NOT!"

"So."

"NOT!"

"So."

"NOT!"

"So."

"NOT!"

"Harry… if you don't stop arguing, you won't get me to read any more or any more reviews. And I'd really hate to have to stop now. It's just getting good."

"Fine! …are not. Times infinity."

"…And yet infinity has no numerical value and therefore does not count in this convirsation. And it's real mature of you to be having this argument."

"Whatever."

And so, for the rest of the chapters, just to tease Harry because he he was family and knew it was true. And though he protested, in truth he loved it (though he might not have exactly liked it); therefore, she made sure to embed those two words.

For Harry is… a review whore.

OWARI!

Not my best piece, I admit. But it was fun to write. And check out NeoRyu777's story.

Like? Hate? Got constructive criticism? Review please!


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